Synopsis:
19+
The truth is subjective to what the lonely lets in.
Emalyn Spicer has lived with it for a long time. She thinks it goes back further than her memories do. She knows it goes back further than the OCD.
When she arrives at college, her OCD's and the lonely refuse to let her have her wish to be normal.
When she meets Sebastian and starts to fall for him, she lets herself believe it's possible to outrun the things chasing her from the past. But how to you get away from the things inside of you? How do you run from yourself?
Just as she gives up and succumbs to the lonely, the unthinkable happens. She finds herself once again trapped in the dark, once again held against her will.
This time she meets the lonely head on. In the darkest corners of her mind, she discovers there is more to her world than she ever imagined. She discovers that the lonely was there for her, protecting her from herself and her secrets.
How far would you go to find yourself?
This is a dark and captivating novel, tread lightly.
Nicky's Review
4 Stars
Characters- I really enjoyed the dynamics of all of the characters. So different and captivating.
Plot/Storyline- This book is so intricately woven that it keeps you invested and wanting to find out one more piece to the puzzle. Fantastic plot with a unique edge. Very different from anything I've read so far.
Steam Factor- The steam is freaking BDSM HOT!! There's not much in the book, but the heat level of each encounter makes up for that.
Cover- Perfect.
Cliffhanger- Nope, but I can not wait to read Lost Boy!!! His POV is going to be amazing!!!
Overall- I freaking enjoyed this book. Not over the moon in love with it, but it was a great read with a unique plot and unexpected twists. I would recommend this to anyone looking for that "different and dark" read. It definitely helped quench my mind f*#k needs.
So we meet Emalyne when she's starting college. She has OCD and is trying to live the "normal" life she has always wanted, despite her mental illness that cripples her attempts around every corner. Just the mere thought of touching someone else gives her an attack. It's very sad and frustrating at times because her OCD acts as a wall between her and happiness. And damn it! This girl DESERVES happiness!!
Em has this mystery fellow who is her beneficiary. We don't meet him, we just get to see her texts and phone conversations with him. Em is well taken care of financially by this asshole and the mystery that hangs in the air is WHO THE HELL is this guy??? He's very controlling and demanding. But Em only calls him when she really needs something and to tell him where she is going and who she will be with. Yup, he's a prick.
Then we meet Sebastian... Getting all warm inside just thinking about this EXTREMELY understanding and HOT guy that is willing to go above and beyond to be with Em. He is just.... WOW!! When we experience his advances and patience it's like Em has won the freaking lottery in men. But Em is unsure about this "normal" relationship. She feels that HE deserves better than her, that her quirky ways are a punishment that he doesn't deserve. So she does what she does best; she runs.
Then one night something happens and life as Em knows it changes DRASTICALLY!!! I mean, DRASTICALLY!! That is all I will say as to not ruin any of the genius plot twists that Tara creates for us.
All in all, I really enjoyed this dark, twisted, captivating, hot and down right crazy book. I read this book in one day!! I couldn't put it down!! Thank you Tara for weaving such a unique story that kept me turning page after page, getting lost in the mystery and misery this story provides. Hats off to you girlie!! XOXO
Favorite Quotes:
“He's normal and squeaky and responsible. Shell would call him Vanilla. I like Vanilla. You know what you're getting into with it. You can add anything to it. It doesn’t spank you and make you like it.”
“He steps forward and kisses my forehead. His breath is soft, devastating warmth on my face. He turns and leaves. He chooses survival over me. It's no different than what I have done. We are both just trying so hard to survive me.”
“I needed to see you." He repeats himself.
I smile. I like that word, need. It's not want. He had no choice because it was a need to see me. I like that.”
“I will always be that guy's girl. I've made him so big in my mind that I can't even move around in there. It's not that I can even be with him. I just won't ever be without him. I'll never be whole without him.”
“What are you doing?" He asks looking intimidating.
I shrug, "I want pancakes."
"I'll make you pancakes."I laugh and turn around to walk backwards, "I don’t want your pancakes. I want normal pancakes. Not head game pancakes. Not maybe I'll make you happy or maybe I'll scare the shit out of you pancakes. You know?”
“The dark is a quiet place. Reflection and contemplation are the only things to do in it. Well that, and imagine the worst things possible.I don’t have to reflect or contemplate or any of those things. I know what the worst things possible are. I know about the things that hide in the dark. Insanity is the least of them.”
“I don’t want to be the china doll you glued back together. I don’t want to look whole from a distance, but when you get close enough you can see all the cracks."
He runs a gloved hand down my cheeks, "The cracks make us who we are."
I shake my head, "We can be better than this.”
~Purchase this Book~
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